Doing the dishes is when I do my best thinking haha
I was on the phone today with a dear friend, discussing my love life. (or lack thereof! otherwise I don't think I'd spend quite so many hours into the night talking to him. Not that I don't enjoy our conversations because I do! I treasure them : ) right here in my heart <3> (are you reading this? haha) friend he is said "kim, what's wrong with what you just said? you don't need to change who you are." I realized as I was doing the dishes, that magically piled up when I wasn't looking, that I didn't explain what I was really trying to convey. In my mind I worked out exactly what I meant while scrubbing food off a pan. Multi-tasking at its best!
I don't want to change who I am. I have a good set of morals and values. I would no sooner change my personality than live in a cardboard box. When I said "change" I meant growth, development, and progress. As people we all grow into who we are over time. We learn from our experiences, make new discoveries, find out which cuts and fabrics fit our body type best. I'm not changing who I am, just adding a few tricks up my sleeves. As a person there are a lot of areas that I need to develop. Everyone has flaws, I just somehow accumulated all of them. Over time I realized I should come with a warning. Right smack dab on my forehead in neon colors: HIGH-MAINTANENCE BITCH. I'm lazy, whiny, never like to get my hands dirty, hold a grudge for all eternity, I always know who to point the finger at, clingy, emotional wreck, overly jealous, and to top it all off a large heaping of neurosis
BUT those are the things about myself that I'm trying to overcome. Before I can even entertain the thought of being in a relationship I first need to go through some (a lot) obstacles. As for the tricks that I'm going to pull out of my hat, I want to learn to cook, pick up the flute again, get dance lessons, fencing, tennis, draw, learn how to give a massage, become witty, artsy, independent, fashionable, to overall become an all around girl : )
